Perceptions, Reality and Misconceptions

"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one,” once said Albert Einstein.
So much of life is played out in our own mind, isn’t it? We ponder - ‘if only this happened’ scenarios, or ‘what if this happens’ scenarios. Sometimes we imagine the best happening but more often than not our first thoughts go to the worst possible outcome. Maybe it’s human nature, part of our primordial instinct to imagine the worst, because after thousands of years of evolution our brains have developed highly honed instinctual survival strategies. Surprisingly, more often than not, the worst does not happen and there is a far more positive outcome than we anticipated. Sometimes, our perceptions about how life will unfold simply do not eventuate, despite all our thinking about it.

It begs the question though, ‘what is reality?’ Most of us think that, what we see and hear is reality. It seems real to us, because of our own personal experiences, or our own ‘history bag’. We tend to translate the world through our own eyes, which may or may not be real or true. There is a common expression that ‘perception is reality’ but if we all have a different take on the same incident, how can everyone’s perception be the right one or the real one? Clearly we can’t all be right. Or can we?

Many years ago, a geneticist Lionel Penrose designed a physical model of an impossible staircase. It was the first impossible object ever made and served as an inspiration for M. C. Escher's famous print that incorporates this staircase, "Ascending and Descending.". The actual model is separated at the right stair, but you can't see the split, because your visual system assumes that it is seeing this model from a non-accidental point of view; hence, it assumes that the stairs are joined. Hard to imagine but the ‘ascending and descending stairs were actually created by Lego builders and there’s a very clever Youtube clip that reveals its secret at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yxDtNgW4Gy4

There are many examples of ‘impossible objects or scenes’, like René Magritte’s 1965 painting of the paradoxical Carte Blanche, which shows a lady riding an impossible horse through a forest. The image is impossible because the horse is split by trees. Logic tells us that such horses don’t exist but still the picture shows us that our mind can perceive it to be so.

According to Professor Gregory, from the psychology department of Bristol University: ‘perceptions are hypotheses, depending upon both on rules, which may conflict, and on assumptions, which may be wrong.’ This is a profound statement because it applies not only to optical illusions but also to life in general. Yes, our perceptions are based on our own assumptions, prejudices and previous experiences, which may be wrong.

Did you know that all humans have a ‘blind spot’ in the retina where the optic nerve is found? No, not a metaphorical blind spot, but an actual blind spot. One of the most amazing natural illusions is that we don’t see black in the blind spot, our brain actually ‘fills in’ the space, using surrounding colours, patterns and other visual data. Our mind fills in ‘missing parts’ in our thinking too – our conjecturing and permutations of what might be or what is, or what we think we understand.

Stephen Covey refers to these personal perceptions as a ‘paradigm’. This paradigm that we all have is the way we see, understand, and interpret the world; it’s personal and it’s what he calls our ‘mental map’. No two people will have exactly the same paradigm or mental map, because all of us have experienced different history, conditioning, families, emotions, in fact we all have very different genetic makeup. So over time we need to check and test our perceptions to see if they are real or merely a misconception that we have made from our own observations.

This is important for adults and for students too. Perceptions about our personal ability and achievements are often contradictory. We know that all of us have a real and sometimes a metaphorical blind spot to identifying our own strengths and weaknesses. Families and schools are good for that little ‘reality check’ from time to time. Suddenly some people find, that ‘the scales fall from their eyes’ as they realise that they have made the wrong assumptions or drawn the wrong conclusions from events that they have heard about or witnessed or worried about something unnecessarily. Perception is not necessarily reality. Covey makes the point that, if you want to make small changes in your life, work on your behaviour; if you want quantum leap changes, you need to work on your paradigms.

Optical illusions are fascinating and compelling, we are drawn to the enigma of them and in a strange way we can learn a little about the way we internalise things and view the world. Yes they can be deceptive,yes the real world can be deceptive too, but more importantly they allow us to look at the world a little differently. Take, for example, this transitional optical illusion - where does the reflection change to a lady? Life's a little like that too. We need to be wary of drawing false conclusions with limited information. We should keep our mind open to the infinite possibilities of the world and just like Alice from Alice in Wonderland: imagine at least six impossible things before breakfast every day.

What is reality? Is reality an illusion, like Einstein suggested? Like the eternal questions: who created the earth or where did matter come from, there is no easy or definitive answer. All we can do is to check our own reality. Never assume that we are right and everyone else has it wrong, and above all keep an open mind, keep an imaginative mind, and believe that all things are possible. See things from different perspectives and be a good listener, it's amazing what we learn when we listen and remain inquisitive about other people's realities.

Karon Graham

Principal

Caloundra City Private School

Statistics are no Substitute for Judgment

There are some people who love numbers – they love the symmetry of them, they love the challenge of calculations, and quadratic equations thrill them for the answers they reveal. Anyone who has even a cursory understanding of science will know Einstein’s most famous and perfect equation of energy and mass in: E=mc². Those who read The Da Vinci Code will remember the heart pounding pace of Robert Langdon solving one problem after another using amongst other things, the Fibonacci sequence of numbers. Numbers in an integer sequence of: 0-1-1-2-3-5-8-13-21. (Each subsequent number is the sum of the previous two.)

Now you might be thinking that our lives are not ruled by numbers, but think again. Famous 1906, Italian economist Vilfredo Pareto created a mathematical formula to describe the unequal distribution of wealth in his country, observing that twenty percent of the people owned eighty percent of the wealth.

From this initial observation, came a world of extrapolation. The 80/20 Rule can be applied to anything: a few (20 percent) are vital and many (80 percent), are trivial. This applies to all sorts of possibilities – 20 percent of customers generate 80percent of the income, 20 percent of people cause you 80 percent of the problems. It seems true, but of course it’s not an exact science by any stretch of the imagination.

Numbers are literally a thing of beauty. Do you know why some faces are more appealing than others? According to experts there is a ‘perfect formula for the ideal face. They say the key to the ideal arrangement of female facial features is the measurements between the eyes, mouth and ears. Scientists have narrowed down to a simple mathematical ratio of 1:1.618, otherwise known as phi, or divine proportion, to set standards of beauty.

In The Elements, the most influential mathematics textbook ever written, Euclid of Alexandria (ca. 300 BC) defined this proportion derived from a division of a line into what he calls its ‘extreme and mean ratio’ from which ‘phi’ or ‘the divine proportion’ or the ‘golden ratio’ was derived. Who could have guessed that this innocent-looking line division would have implications for numerous natural phenomena ranging from the leaf and seed arrangements of plants to the structure of the crystals of some aluminium alloys, and from the arts to the stock market?

Until recently I had never heard of the Mehrabian Rule but to my amazement I have found an underlying formula that makes perfect sense in understanding what people are really communicating to others. Most parents, particularly parents of teenagers, will instantly appreciate the simplicity of this rule which Albert Mehrabian can apply to most conversations. Essentially it’s this: listen to my voice and look at my body language to know what I’m really trying to say to you, rather than rely on the words that are spoken. Mehrabian found that in communication:
• 7% happens in spoken words
• 38% happens through voice tone; and
• 55% happens via general body language.

His conclusions, while very generalised, basically suggest that:
• it's not just words: a lot of communication comes through non-verbal communication
• without seeing and hearing non-verbals, it is easier to misunderstand the words; and
• when we are unsure about words and when we trust the other person less, we pay more attention to the non-verbals of what we hear and see.

Yes this makes perfect sense to me. It explains why printed words in emails and text messages and on Facebook can so easily be misconstrued or misunderstood. Printed communication is becoming more common that face-to-face communication in this technologically driven world. Similarly drawing conclusions about organisations, by making statistical comparisons can be fraught with danger too.

In an educational setting, many parents are drawn to make comparisons between schools by using ACARA’s MySchool and the new version MySchool 2.0, which will be released on Friday, 4 March. While the statistical information found at MySchool on Caloundra City Private School is very favourable, particularly in the 2010 NAPLAN results, it’s important for parents to understand that there is much more to a school than the direct comparison of one school against another in a purely statistical and graphical format. Improvements in NAPLAN results over time will vary depending on each cohort of students. CCPS has, over the last two years, shown ‘higher than average’ gains by our students, thanks to the excellent teaching and learning programs of our teachers. Remember that NAPLAN results are a diagnostic tool used by teachers to improve educational outcomes, NAPLAN results were never intended to be used to make comparisons between schools.

Add to the mix the financial data that is now available to all parents on all Australian schools, there is bound to be some misperceptions and some confusion. Students in independent and state schools depend on both federal and state government grants. However, the average yearly funding per student differs significantly with the funding figure for government schools being $12,639 for each student, while in the independent sector, is $6,076 for each student – almost half that of state schools.

In addition to this, most independent schools, like CCPS, have borrowed significantly to fund capital projects in the School, with the average level of debt across the sector is around $7000 per student. As a relatively new school the level of debt for CCPS is higher than many other schools but will over time, like in all schools, fall as the school grows. The data available will also show that 52percent of income of independent schools comes from the after tax income of parents, which represents a significant investment of our parents in the education of your son or daughter.

While we have much to celebrate at Caloundra City Private School, it’s important for parents to keep the statistical information in perspective. Just like in the Mehrabian Rule, much of what really happens in a school, like the values, the quality of teaching and learning, and your son or daughter’s happiness cannot be quantified and defined by a statistical measure. Walking into a school or a classroom, talking to the teacher or seeing the quality of work that your son or daughter produces or how happy they are, is a wonderful way of seeing the real value of what we do at the School.

Yes the world is full of numbers and whether we like it or not, much in life, like in mathematics, can be quantified, complicated and simplified - often simultaneously. As Gudder once said:
"The essence of mathematics is not to make simple things complicated, but to make complicated things simple."

However, some formulae, some statistics may oversimplify education to factors that are meaningless. The real heart of the School is in the actual School – not in the statistics of the School. How do you quantify happiness, or self esteem or confidence? Surely these are every bit as important (if not more important) as the students’ achievements. Yes I love numbers too, but I love them for the way that they better inform me and help me build a strong, vibrant and engaging learning environment. Henry Clay summed it up (no pun intended) when he said:

'Statistics are no substitute for judgment. '

Karon Graham
Principal

What can we do in times of trouble and adversity?

In troubling times and times of adversity, we sometimes lose sight of where we’re going and we can lose our sense of purpose and momentum in life. We can even doubt many things about ourselves, like our own value to others or our contribution to the greater good of society. It’s only natural to wonder why something bad has happened to us. What did we do to deserve this in our lives? Or to ponder why some people have bad luck or more tragedy in their lives than what seems fair. Malcolm Fraser once infamously said that: life wasn’t meant to be easy. This is small consolation to people trying to work through immeasurable grief or hardship but there’s an element of truth to the comment that life does not promise to be easy or fair.

Many people are shaking their heads and wondering what on earth is going on with the unprecedented natural disasters across Queensland: widespread destructive flooding, followed by a category five cyclone, and now across the Pacific Ocean, the devastating earthquake in New Zealand’s South Island. For all of us, and particularly young people, it can be very distressing to see these graphic, real-time images on television, on-line, or in newspapers and magazines. Often we’re left worrying about our own mortality.

The pain and suffering seen on television, is unbearable to watch at times, because we have a ‘mirror neuron’ which puts us there in the place of the people we are watching. It seems real and in our minds, it’s very real. We can easily imagine ourselves in that very same situation and it’s not uncommon for us to be thinking ‘what if?’, that could be me and my family.
For this reason, it’s better to limit the amount of ‘live newscasts’ on television that young people watch. If there is a natural disaster or a tragedy, remember:

• 
  • when they do watch the natural disasters unfolding, take the time to talk them through the situation – give them details but don’t overload them
  • reassure your son or daughter about their own safety and well being
  • explain how people are helping those affected by the disaster and that people are coming to their rescue because this may not be obvious or understood by the very young
  • give them hope, don’t dwell on the sadness or inevitability of it
  • use the opportunity to talk about what you and they might do in a similar situation
  • talk about what you and they could do to help if possible
  • always question the child’s understanding of what they have seen on television; and
  • make sure your child feels safe and secure before going to sleep.

Tragedy on the scale we have witnessed in recent months, whether it affects us directly or indirectly, can bring us down and can make us feel very ‘small’ and vulnerable in the scheme of things. Some of us worry about these tragic events, even though we’re not directly affected by them and there are others, who are directly affected by the disasters and worry about how the events are going to impact on them or on the lives of loved ones. To all of the families affected by recent disasters, you are in our thoughts and prayers. We have all shared some tears and felt a little helpless at the magnitude of what has happened recently. We can make a difference to someone’s life though, so please let me know if we can help you or your family.

Our “Caloundra Reaches Out Concert’ is a deliberate way that we can all make a difference to someone else’s life by supporting the concert on Sunday, 6 March and bring along as many family and friends as possible. All money raised will go to the Premier’s Disaster Relief Fund, so please come to the concert and make a small contribution to helping someone less fortunate than you.

The very worst thing we can do, at this point in time, is to bundle up all of our problems and go into a downward emotional spiral and say it’s all too much and give up. If you don’t do anything to resolve the problems or issues, by dealing with issues one at a time, the situation or problem will get worse. Now I know it’s easier said than done, as Ashleigh Brilliant flippantly commented:
It's not easy taking my problems one at a time when they refuse to get in line.

Worry can be debilitating, because it can sometimes take us into a headspace where we become pessimistic about life in general and at worst can cause us to lose enjoyment in life itself. It helps to be philosophical about life, as Robert Brault said:

Sometimes in tragedy we find our life's purpose - the eye sheds a tear to find its focus.

In his bestselling book, How to Win Over Worry, John Haggai suggests some great strategies to overcome worry and to overcome adversity:

• 
  • rejoice in life - life is too short to spend time worrying
  • take control of your actions and response to your emotions
  • count your blessings – someone is always worse off than you
  • become genuinely interested in other people – love your neighbour as yourself and help your neighbours, as well as complete strangers
  • never expect thanks – practise random acts of kindness
  • we are what we think – so think positive and expect the best possible outcome
  • master self-control – don’t retaliate or react negatively to criticism
  • be enthusiastic – enthusiasm creates passion, endorphins released will make you feel better and happier
  • relax - relaxing can increase your effectiveness
  • be active – be industrious, be useful to others, exercise too; and
  • seize the day – live in the moment that is today, don’t worry about the past or the future.

Life is never easy, not necessarily fair, sometimes upsetting and hurtful and often very messy. This is no reason to think the worst though. Be positive, be optimistic, be enthusiastic and be a doer of good, I am always inspired by this prayer by St. Francis of Assisi (1182-1226) and whether you’re religious or not, there is a powerful message here for all of us.

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.


O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal light.

Karon Graham
Principal Caloundra City Private School

Help For Friends in Need

“Oh I get by with a little help from my friends…”
Lyrics sung by arguably one of the best musical groups of all time and one of my favourite groups - The Beatles. Have you ever wondered why some groups gel together, making hit after hit, while others never make the grade or at best have a one hit wonder and then fade into oblivion? The musical genius of The Beatles grew out of the very different interests and skills that each band member brought to the group, resulting in classics like: I Get By With a Little Help From My Friends, Come Together, Help, Imagine, Can’t Buy Me Love, Yesterday and hundreds of other songs that have stood the test of time. What makes The Beatles stand out as one of the all time great musical bands? Was it the chemistry of the four beatniks? Was it their individual talent or genius for lyrics and music? Or was it something else?

Synergy is that secret ingredient that takes the ordinary to the extraordinary. It’s not just in the music world, that such creative synergy exists though. Think about the sporting world and the combinations that brought such success to the Brisbane Broncos, year after year, or the former, (it grieves me to say) winning combination of the Australian Cricket team that endured for many long years. In the business world, we find similar creative synergy that results in the kind of incredible innovation in communications – like Apple’s iPod and iPad. Teams of people worked with Steve Jobs, Apple’s co-founder and CEO, to create and produce this amazing new technology.

Steve Jobs is a creative genius but he didn’t achieve what he did alone, and let’s face it, he only achieved these remarkable things with the help of others. Synergy in essence occurs when a group of people can achieve so much more than any one individual working alone. It begs the question though: do you have to be an extraordinary person to achieve great things? One of the great authors of our time said:

I learned the most important lesson of my life: that the extraordinary is not the birthright of a chosen and privileged few, but of all people, even the humblest. That is my one certainty… (Paolo Coehlo)

Think about the efforts of ordinary people in Brisbane, in Toowoomba, and all over the state during the recent floods, as well as the devastating cyclone Yasi. Yes many an ordinary person went to extraordinary lengths to risk their own life to help save others or to help neighbours and strangers get to safety or to help clean up after the devastation had passed. These were extraordinary circumstances that ordinary people found themselves in and many thousands of ordinary people pitched in to help fellow Australians – strangers - but in a true Australian style, we considered all of these people as ‘our mates’ and thought nothing of giving our time and our money to help those affected. The sad truth is though, that many of these people still need our help, because they are still without flood insurance, still without homes restored and still struggling financially.

Whether a partnership of music or business or even education, there are certain special ingredients that contribute to the success of partnerships or a group of people. Sir Ken Robinson, author of “The Element” maintains that the critical elements of extraordinary and successful synergy – the magic that comes when people work together and achieve an extraordinary outcome that would not be possible with just one person working individually. People often derive a large sense of who they are through affiliation with a specific group and it’s likely to boost their self esteem too. Schools, too, can provide this kind of connectedness.

According to Robinson, the best and most creative teams are diverse, dynamic and distinct. The group or partnership needs different sorts of people, with different but complementary talents. Diversity of talents is important, but it’s not enough. Robinsons argues that successful groups have a distinctive personality and come together to do something specific – to get a job done.

Caloundra City Private School is organising a “Caloundra Reaches Out Concert” at the Caloundra RSL on Sunday, 6 March at 3pm to 5.00pm to raise funds for the Premier’s Appeal. The concert will be a great family event with a fabulous magician, the Tenorissimos, the Sunshine Coast Orchestra and other performers such as the singing sensation, 13 year old Straalen McCallum, who recently appeared on Channel 7’s Sunrise and was one of the youngest stars ever signed to Sony Music Australia. Tickets are priced for families: $25 Adults, $10 children and $50 for a family ticket – two adults and up to three children and will be available from the School and from the Reception Desk at the Caloundra RSL.

When there is a greater need than our own, it’s time to think about what we can do to help. This is a special way that our families and the wider community of Pelican Waters and Caloundra can help raise funds for fellow Queenslanders in need. It’s the Australian way to help our mates, and what better way to help our mates by making a contribution as a school community, to the Premier’s Disaster Appeal and enjoying a concert in the process.

The School is in a partnership with parents. The success of this partnership depends on the support and willingness of parents to commit to the common vision, shared values and sense of purpose in achieving the best that we can for the young people in our care. We can teach our young people the power of teamwork by the whole school community committing to this event. Surely each of us wants our young people to grow up with a strong sense of community and a commitment to helping others in need, it’s the very least we can do. Extraordinary things happen when ordinary people band together to make things happen. This is something we can all do; we can make a difference to so many people affected by the devastating floods and cyclone.

James Taylor once sang….
When you're down and troubled
and you need a helping hand
and nothing, whoa, nothing is going right…..

Hey now, all you've got to do is call.
Lord, I'll be there, yes I will. ……

Ain't it good to know you've got a friend.
You've got a friend.

Let’s be that friend. Let’s be that extraordinary team that comes together, with all of our will, to realise a goal of helping our fellow Queenslanders.

Karon Graham
Principal

What leadership legacy will you leave?

Have you ever wondered why ancient people created, carved and built such monumental and remarkable features that have stood the test of time? These relics of the past are some of the most enduring mysteries of life on earth. Why have people since the dawn of time, left these mysterious creations?

Some are gigantic megaliths, while others are more humble and simple arrangements of rocks and stones or carvings in rock. Deep in the caves of France, Indonesia and Laura in far north Queensland are rock paintings which have survived to this day as testament of another time, another people , and another lifestyle.

Amazing icons like Stonehenge – a ring of grey rocks on the desolate Salisbury Plain in England, chiselled and placed there over 4000 years ago. It is unique in prehistoric standing stones, for the fact that, all of the rock was artificially shaped and placed in an architectural plan. Was it a religious meeting place or an elaborate way to predict eclipses of the moon and sun or simply an observatory of the universe above?

Over a thousand kilometres away in the Pacific Ocean on a remote, tiny island, stand the eerie stone giants of Easter Island. They stand like sentinels, keeping guard over the horizon.

The massive and imposing pyramids and sphinx of Egypt built over 3000 years ago, which took thousands of people and many years to construct and in the ancient city of Teotihuacan in Mexico, well before the Aztecs, was a city of wide avenues and massive pyramids built more than 1400 years ago. Although considered primitive, ancient people have shown wonderful resourcefulness to create and build these amazing monuments to honour great leaders, great civilizations and demonstrate a great understanding of the power of leaving a legacy.

Further south in the desert plains of Peru at Nazca, are incredible rock shapes which can best be seen from the air. These precision drawings, using only piles of stone and rocks are spectacularly large, with one solar line drawn over 6 kilometres long, with 18 bird shaped figures, spiders and other shapes only discerned from the air, but why ? It would be another thousand years before people could fly and see them from the air.

On the weekend, astrophysicists reported that they have discovered an ancient Aboriginal sundial , west of Melbourne, that could be more than 10,000 years old – older than the Stonehenge, older than the pyramids of Egypt. Not as grand but still impressive for its time.


In the most remote northern hemisphere in the Arctic region are found stones built in the form called inukshuk by the Inuit people. They indicate migration routes or places where food can be found and sometimes they are built to signify places of power or important spiritual places. These ancient relics were built in many different designs – some mean “you are on the right path.” And others simply mean “someone was here.”

Around the world we find these ancient remnants of past civilisations. Since time immemorial, ancient peoples have left reminders of their presence. At the most basic level, I guess all of these ancient relics – large or small - are a way of people saying “someone was here.” Don’t forget that we were here; remember us. It’s their legacy to future generations – something special happened here.

Many did not have a written form of communication, or if they did, they knew that the written form would not survive unless it was carved in stone or rock. So the only way to leave a message, and to leave a legacy was in the form of a great monument of rock or stone – something that would not perish over time.
Napoleon Bonaparte once said:
“The human race is governed by its imagination.”
We are led and governed by the endless possibilities that lie ahead, untapped, unknown until someone reveals them. It’s a basic human desire to be remembered. Each of us deep inside wants to leave a legacy of sorts. We want to know that we have made a difference in this life – to someone - to our family, to our friends and for some people the power to influence and inspire tens or hundreds, even thousands, if not millions of people.

What kind of legacy do you wish to leave? Have you given any thought to the difference that you can make to other people’s lives? You have enormous power to do something positive in your life. Leadership is not the kind of thing to be taken lightly. It requires courage, fortitude and integrity. Leadership, like rock, is hard but once understood can transform lives – including your own.

Leadership means taking on more responsibilities.
Leadership is helping others before you help yourself.

As Winston Churchill said:
“We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.”

Leadership is having the moral fortitude and integrity to do the right thing all the time – not just when someone is looking.

Leadership is leading people in the right direction.
Leadership is having enthusiasm, being energetic and sharing your time with others willingly. John Quincy Adams once said:

“ The influence of each human being on others, in this life, is a kind of immortality.”

It’s the kind of immortality, like the ancient peoples used – their immortality was in rock and stone, but your immortality can be in words and deeds and just as enduring. Be the sort of leader that leaves a legacy for others to follow in your footsteps, just like the Inuit people.

Be a rock. In other words, be strong for others to look up to and follow with confidence. Above all, be the kind of leader that people respect, can count on and trust.

“In matters of style, swim with the current,
In matters of principle, stand like a rock.”

Taking the Worry Out of the Return to School

Returning to school for most students is a positive experience – catching up with friends, meeting new people and the excitement of new learning combines in such a way that it seems young ones are running on adrenalin for the first week or so. Like all natural ‘highs’, there comes a time where it all catches up with your son or daughter and suddenly you find that they are tired very early in the day and wanting to sleep more and lacking energy. Also starting at a new school with new teachers, new subjects and new people can set up more stresses and strains.

Older students on the other hand, begin the year with determined effort, to stay on top of their studies and homework and will often stay up very late and insist that they ‘absolutely, have to’ get something completed before they go to bed which could be as late as midnight. The end result can be that students ‘overdo it in the first few weeks’ and for some students they then ‘hit a wall’ and say that it’s all too hard and it ends in tears. This can be upsetting for parents, who want to encourage their sons and daughters to achieve and do well, but at the same time don’t want them to be so emotional, worried and upset. It’s important to get the right balance because as parents you want to encourage your son or daughter to do well but at the same time, we need to set some sensible boundaries for homework and study.

Homework for the very youngest students (Prep to Year 3) - around 15 minutes is acceptable, Years 4 -7 about 30 – 60 minutes, Years 8 – 10 about 60 to 90 minutes and Years 11 and 12, around 2 to 3 hours is the norm. Obviously homework time and study time may vary depending on the day of the week and time of the year, upcoming examinations and due dates for assignments for example, however; with these time allocations in mind, parents will have a better sense of what is fair and reasonable for your child.

Please consider some of these simple strategies to help reduce stress any upset: around school, homework and study. Developing good routines with your son or daughter is one of the most important keys to the kind of good start you want for your child.

The Night before School:

• Develop routines with your son or daughter.
• Ensure that they are prepared for the next day – everything is packed the night before ready for school, PE clothes, Library books, Permission forms signed, homework completed etc.
• Students of all ages, need to get a good night’s sleep – 8 hours for everyone and younger students will need longer. Having a routine of the same bed time for younger students helps prepare them for sleep time.
• Quiet time before bed helps relax the brain. Quiet reading time for older students and reading stories to younger students will help this process. Blaring music or television or intense impact computer games will not relax your child and it will make the process of falling asleep difficult.

Before School

• Always – no matter what the rush – ensure that everyone has a good breakfast and students have a nutritious morning tea and lunch for school. The television ad that shows the ‘fuzziness of the brain without food’ is funny, but it’s also true. Growing children do need high energy foods – and not high energy ‘sugar’ drinks.
• Remind your child to drink plenty of water. Research shows that dehydration and a lack of water, also makes it difficult for students to concentrate in class.

After School:

• Listen to what your child has to say on the way home in the car (or when they arrive home) – this is where you get the best sense of how the day has gone; remember that students will be more emotional at this time than later – keep it all in perspective. Be reflective in your listening – don’t jump in and ask too many questions. Let your child tell you in their own way and rather than ask questions that only require a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ response, make statements that allow them to give a longer response.
• Let them change into casual clothes straight away
• Allow time for play or relaxation for an hour
• Have a set time for homework and make sure that they have a space to do the homework. It’s ok to do homework with you around but try to keep the noise to a minimum where possible and encourage your child to problem solve before seeking help from you. Avoid giving the answer to your child.
• Homework should not be stressful for the student or parent. If your child is having difficulty, either, write a note to the teacher or make a time to meet with the teacher to discuss the issue. The teachers at CCPS are here to help you, please talk to them sooner rather than later about any problems.
• Encourage your son or daughter to find solutions to his or her problems without your intervention. This is important to allow students to develop their own problem solving strategies. If they are having difficulty solving the problem, having a small break can help but not if the break is watching television which can become a huge time waster.
• Praise your child genuine efforts but avoid overdoing the praise. Be specific about what you are praising your child for and only give praise when it’s deserved.
• Encouragement and praise are powerful motivators for your son or daughter, use criticism sparingly and seek to find a positive way to encourage your son or daughter to work harder or to a higher level. Keep it fun and interesting!

No two people study the same way, and there is little doubt that what works for one person may not work for another. However, there are some general techniques that seem to produce good results. No one would argue that every subject that you have to take is going to be so interesting that studying it is not work but pleasure. We can only wish.

Everyone is different, and for some students, studying and being motivated to learn comes naturally. Your son or daughter’s success in school is dependent on his or her ability to study effectively and efficiently. The results of poor study skills are wasted time, frustration, and low or failing grades. All I can say, upon reflection of many years as a teacher, (and parents I know you will agree), is that time is precious and not to be squandered, no matter what your son or daughter believes right now.

Parents, my blog on 3 February, 2009 has much more detail, for older students, on how to study more effectively and includes some useful strategies for learning and studying sourced from a range of websites and books.

Effective study skills must be practised in order for you to improve. It is not enough to simply "think about" studying; you have to actually do it, and in the process use information from what you do, to get better. All that follows depends on this single concept. At school, I often talk to the students about setting a goal to improve by 10% - this is a relatively small percentage and is achievable. Over time, like compound interest the improvement in a student’s academic performance can be profound. The secret is to be persistent, to continue to practise the skills necessary to learn and over time, student achievements will improve too because:

"Practice doesn't make perfect; perfect practice makes perfect."

Author, Louise May Alcott, once wrote:

“Have regular hours for work and play;
Make each day both useful and pleasant,
And prove that you understand the worth
Of time by employing it well.

Then youth will be delightful,
Old age will bring few regrets and life
Will become a beautiful success,
In spite of poverty.”

A lovely sentiment to help keep us all grounded on life and the 'here and now'. Life is all about finding the right balance, don’t you think?

Karon Graham

What sort of effect do you have on other people?

Have you ever wondered how you affect other people’s lives? You’d like to think it was a good effect, wouldn’t you? People would leave you feeling better about themselves and about you as a person. Sometimes this is true and other times, quite the reverse is the case - we leave people feeling hurt and upset – even though that may not have been our intention. We have all experienced the thought: ‘if only I could have changed what I said or did’, but many of us don’t have an opportunity to undo what has happened or take back what was said.

Some of you may have read “Five People You Meet in Heaven” by Mitch Albom, which tells the moving story of Eddie who is accidentally killed on his 83rd birthday saving a young girl from certain death. He wakes in heaven and is taken on a journey ‘back in time’ to meet five people whose lives he has affected. The strange thing about the journey is that Eddie does not always know the people and is totally oblivious to the impact he has had on someone else’s life.

Ironically, while his life has intersected with other people’s, in an almost random way, the theme that runs through the book is that nothing is random and there are no random acts in life.
Eddie reflects on his life and realises he has had a far greater impact on other people’s lives than he ever gave himself credit for while he was alive. Some people have been saved by Eddie’s actions, one has lost his life and others have been affected for the better by his deeds. Ultimately Eddie realises that in spite of his bitterness, anger and regret about his life, he has made a difference to many people’s lives and Talia the last person he meets, helps him see this in the most emotional way imaginable.

In the book: “The Butterfly Effect” by New York Times bestselling author, Andy Andrews, shares some real life stories of how one person’s actions affected not one, not five but millions of people’s lives for the better. He begins the book by recounting how in 1963, Edward Lorenz presented a hypothesis to the New York Academy of Science which stated that:
“A butterfly could flap its wings and set molecules of air in motion, which would move other molecules of air, which in turn would move even more molecules, eventually capable of starting a hurricane on the other side of the planet.”

While this theory was dismissed and ridiculed, years later physics professors announced The Law of Sensitive Dependence Upon Initial Conditions’, which supports the notion that the first movement of any form of matter – including people - can result in very different outcomes.
Andrews gives some wonderful real life experiences of how individuals have changed the course of history and changed the world forever because of a single action or words said. Take Norman Borlaug, for example, or George Washington Carver or Henry Wallace, and I’m guessing that you don’t know who these people are, but they were scientists, Henry Wallace was a former Vice President of the USA and by their very actions, individually and collectively, were responsible for hybridized high yield, disease resistant corn and wheat for arid climates, which have in turned saved billions of people’s lives.

The message is clear. Each of us has huge potential to influence other people’s lives – either directly or indirectly. Your actions and your words can make a difference – positive or negative on one person’s life or maybe thousands of people can be affected by what you say and do.

Don’t underestimate the power of one person (yourself included) to change the world, to change the course of history, or simply to change the life of one other person for the better. Life is not as random as it seems and the people you meet and interact with may in turn be changed forever because of your words or your actions.

As Andrews says in his conclusion:
“Your life …
And what you do with it today
Matters Forever. "